It’s All Coming Together Nicely
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Wisdom Wednesdays-#340 December 6 The Strong Within Daily Affirmation Podcast
It’s All Coming Together Nicely
I have the tendency to overexaggerate. When something’s going wrong, I find it easy to focus on all the many ways it could continue going wrong or how it could get worse. My buddy Ben used to call me worry wart. He would tell me to stop thinking so hard about things.
I love to think about everything that could happen. For some reason, I think it helps to calm me. It helps me to think about what could go wrong so I’m prepared for it, or to know how to change directions if need be. And I’m not saying this is a bad thing, but what I’ve found is it’s easier to plan and keep planning than to take action and get moving.
And I’m not sure if this is the right emotion, but… I think we feel fear from starting something and not getting it right. We look at all the time we wasted, and maybe even the fear of looking foolish for not knowing better. And we get annoyed with having to start over, if we try something and it doesn’t work out. But we have misunderstood what it means to start over. Starting will only ever happen if we give up. I had a personal training client who belonged to Weight Watchers, and she was disappointed with her progress. So I asked her what was going on and where she was having issues, and she said I’m fine during the week but during the weekends I go out to eat and eat so bad that I stop logging in my points and start over on Monday.
And so I suggested to her, to stop starting over. To log the points in regardless even if it’s not perfect. It was my hope that even if she didn’t do exactly what she wanted to do, that over time she would become more aware of it, find better choices that would make her feel better, and learn not to deprive herself but to be smarter and healthier with her food intake.
I know for me, when things aren’t going great it’s easier to say everything is going wrong. It’s easy for me to throw my hands up in the air and give up. I get overwhelmed, and when I get overwhelmed, I get stuck. I over exaggerate the situation, and build up anxiety instead of seeing the real truth that it’s not all falling apart…but really I’m only sliding. I’m sliding from the habits that help me stay on the best path for me. Sliding is a more subtle word, and it helps to change the anxiety within myself knowing that I have more of a handle on things than I thought…or maybe I should correct that last statement. It’s not that I have more of a handle on things, it’s that I have more of a handle on me and my thoughts and emotions.
By making that anxious thought more subtle, it’s becomes more manageable, and it brings an awareness that I can change directions if I decide to do something about it. And I believe we all have some sort of thing that hinders us…we have those addiction that keeps us from being the people we want to be. And there are the big three that most people will say are addictions such as sex, drugs, and alcohol; but it could be the addictions to overeating, perfectionism, technology, porn, getting into unhealthy relationships, shopping, and I’m sure we could come up with a million more… but really, all an addiction is—is a distraction. I’m sure the origin of the negative action was meant to help us escape from our lives, from our pains, and from our thoughts…even for just a moment at first.
That’s why I believe a lot of us have the tendency to be addicted to focusing on negative thoughts. It’s more exciting and easier to stay in chaos and to be in flight or fight mode than to focus on peace an tranquility. It’s easier to focus on what’s going wrong. It’s easier to focus on how it could get even worse than to do the work of focusing on solutions and appreciating the beautiful things already within your life.
I believe change happens more deeply when we stop beating ourselves up for our mistakes and begin loving ourselves through them…and because of them. So, what if you were to not immediately look at how the world could be ending for your mistakes, but how you might be sliding from the place you want to be? What if you were to look at the habits you are sliding away from, and look towards the habits you want to step towards?
We make change more complicated than it has to be. Every day is a new beginning, and every thought we focus on will either slide us off our path…or be the footsteps that keep us upon it. I’m sure there was a time in your life when it felt like your world was ending…and it didn’t. So let us stop starting over, let us stop focusing on every little mistake by beating ourselves up over it, and instead begin loving ourselves through life. Let us be more subtle in defining our problems as we get away from the end of the world mentality and see the choices we make as either us sliding slowly off our path or either choices that are bringing us back to it.
Today’s Personal Commitment:
What problems are you over exaggerating, and how can you reframe them to being more subtle? What problems are you continually starting over, and how can you stick with them to get to the solution instead of continually spinning your wheels? Write your answers down, and then begin putting those solutions into action this week. Change is always a subtle shift. It’s usually never an immediate 180-degree turn. So be patient and persistent in loving yourself through the problems and the change. Remember, it’s not the end of the world…it’s only a small problem that you’ll fix.
It’s All Coming Together Nicely
Thanks for listening. I’m sending great energy your way as we become Strong Within together,
Personal Development Life Coach-
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